Baseball T-Shirts

Description: Syntax error: sobriety detected.

Description: More gravy, less drama.

Description: Said no one ever... after five beers.

Description: One sip closer to my next bad idea.

Description: Pussy: it’s what’s for dinner.

Description: Normalize chaos. And gay sex.

Description: NPC by choice, not by script.

Description: My gym membership includes emotional damage.

Description: This is my polite face.

Description: Freedom isn't free - it comes with a side of sarcasm.

Description: They scream, I sass. Balance.

Description: Dead inside, thriving outside.

Description: Dinosaurs didn’t read—don’t be like dinosaurs.

Description: Boss makes a dollar, I make existential dread.

Description: Maybe you're the myth here.

Description: Ho ho hold my pants.

Description: Luck isn't a plan - it's a vibe.

Description: The middle finger: now ISO certified.

Description: Rules are more like... suggestions, right?

Description: Dead serious about winning.

Description: Freedom tastes better when it's forbidden.

Description: Your version came out before the software update.

Description: Nothing screams commitment like lifelong dread.

Description: Believe in yourself... or extraterrestrials. Whichever shows up first.

Description: Best friends help you hide the evidence.

Description: Perfect for when you want Halloween vibes but zero effort.

Description: Cute on the outside, danger on the inside.

Description: Half my energy goes to not giving a damn.

Description: Cupid can wait - this burger can't.

Description: Too jolly to function.

Description: Holiday cheer: held together with duct tape and sarcasm.

Description: Namaste... but also nah.

Description: Problem? Party.

Description: Approach with caution - sarcasm fully loaded.

Description: If I'm asleep, I'm probably being polite.

Description: Powered by playlists and poor decisions.