Description: Feliz Navidad, behave never.
$22.00
Description: Dead serious about the party.
Description: Dad status: dangerously legendary.
Description: Ask me if I care. Spoiler: no.
Description: One tequila away from fluent chaos.
Description: Sugar skull sass with zero apologies.
Description: Grandpa status: fully legendary.
Description: Wear the roots, skip the apology.
Description: Mud happens. I accelerate.
Description: Polish by blood, queen by public consensus.
Description: Nice vibes, questionable personality.
Description: Gossip is our cardio.
Description: English is just the warmup.
Description: Responsibilities can wait.
Description: Confusion is basically my default setting.
Description: My schedule is naps and ignoring you.
Description: I choked a cougar and lived to brag.
Description: Pray loud. Comply later.
Description: Approved zones may change without notice.
Description: Metal joints, sharper mouth.
Description: Apparently thinking is a radical act now.
Description: Fueled by spite and terrible intentions.
Description: Celebrate diversity, chicken edition.
Description: History carved the punchline in stone.
Description: Sunday soul, Saturday Bigfoot hunt.
Description: Wake me when something important happens.
Description: I chose heat and consequences.
Description: Store bought? I took that personally.
Description: Official uniform of the superior dad club.
Description: I inspect. I approve. I eat.
Description: Blessed are the cheese obsessed.
Description: Pour it like you mean it.
Description: No cookies survive my shift.
Description: Going home just to sleep.
Description: Promoted to exhausted.
Description: This hot dog has boundaries.
