Description: Correcting my grammar? Not when I'm holding a nail gun.
$25.00
Description: Night shift: where sleep goes to die.
Description: Censored? Not in this country.
Description: Power tools and power moves, baby.
Description: Valentine's Day? Hard pass.
Description: Relationship advice: swift and direct
Description: No girlfriend, no emotional rollercoaster.
Description: My heart beats in reps.
Description: Mentally unplugged for maintenance.
Description: Zero urgency. Maximum irony.
Description: Stay wild - it confuses the normal.
Description: Tech support, not your emotional support.
Description: Wore this to avoid matching PJs.
Description: Because chaos is less cute unmedicated.
Description: Deep thoughts are overrated - shake it.
Description: Not a regular mom - just trying to keep the next generation tolerable.
Description: Too tired to care, too sore to move.
Description: At least the speeches would be purr-suasive.
Description: Woke up and chose chaos.
Description: I season with spite and garlic.
Description: Tequila brings the spice, vodka brings the bad decisions, rum’s just here for the chaos, whiskey thinks it’s in charge.
Description: One more round before lockdown.
Description: Dangerous job, even hotter benefits.
Description: I dial defense, not numbers.
Description: Proof cows give zero grass.
Description: Flames aren't the only thing he handles well.
Description: Arcade champ, life novice.
Description: Ban nonsense, not my rights.
Description: Retired but still armed - with dad jokes.
Description: Fierce, floral, and fully Ukrainian.
Description: I trust my dog with the nuclear codes more than any politician.
Description: Running on caffeine and questionable decisions.
Description: Nature heals, but not from this hangover.
Description: Superpowers are cool - sacrifice is real.
Description: Our national sport? Outdrinking the rest.
Description: Ideal for sarcastic and sassy personalities with a taste for adult humor!
