Description: Currently accepting zero responsibilities.
$25.00
Description: Seeing life through every color but straight.
Description: Who needs a costume when you've got attitude?
Description: Biker lips taste like freedom.
Description: You can’t suffer if you forget your wishlist.
Description: When your Frenchie has more attitude than you.
Description: Because raising girls means raising voices.
Description: Squad goals, but make it Canadian.
Description: Bring holiday cheer (and protein powder).
Description: Because sleep is for people without case law to read.
Description: Because commitment is great, but wanderlust is better.
Description: Do I look like I’m available for conversation?
Description: One peel away from a breakdown.
Description: Join the club - we didn’t want you here either.
Description: Cupid's got nothing on my pup.
Description: Master of clucks, keeper of chaos.
Description: Santa rolls deep and so do I.
Description: Solving problems one formula at a time.
Description: Not dead, not thrilled - just here.
Description: Powered by snorts and sass.
Description: Retirement: because I've earned the right to ignore you.
Description: No warranty on how you take it.
Description: Overthinking is my cardio.
Description: Farm life - but make it feral.
Description: Grading papers with a side of Merlot.
Description: Sorry Grandpa, this one's not your jurisdiction.
Description: I like my drinks stiff and my humor dry.
Description: Leading the team... from the couch.
Description: Because normal mixers are for amateurs.
Description: For those who crust in the power of puns.
Description: Explain it again, but slower this time.
Description: Channel your inner Norse god.
Description: If you ask, you already know the answer.
Description: Real dads run on smoke and sarcasm.
Description: Uphill battles, downhill thrills.