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Description: Warning: zero interest in your standards.

Description: Not just a sport - a mindset.

Description: Real men come with extra awesomeness.

Description: If I wanted problems, I'd go back to high school.

Description: A little dirt never hurt.

Description: Big kid. Bigger toys. Still dirty.

Description: Because nothing sticks like a good joke.

Description: For sky gods with sarcasm.

Description: For the proud, the loud, and the Polska crowd.

Description: Paycheck? Nah. Peace and naps? Absolutely.

Description: Retirement isn't a full-time job - being annoying is.

Description: Brains are cool - too bad they're not contagious.

Description: Serious truck, not-so-serious attitude.

Description: All the authority - none of the paperwork.

Description: Future firehouse legend in training.

Description: Not your average rocking chair story.

Description: Still mad, still rad, still killing it.

Description: Swim Bike Run Like Your Life Depends On It.

Description: Freedom comes signed in sacrifice.

Description: Give life more stretch, strength, and smiles.

Description: Because nothing says love like a tangent line.

Description: Rates go up with your mouth.

Description: Booty-building, one squat at a time.

Description: It's not what you think - or maybe it is.

Description: Flexing: it's a lifestyle, not a phase.

Description: From pushups to paperwork - survived it all.

Description: Some dream. Others serve.

Description: The longer the beard, the deeper the bugs.

Description: Proof you should’ve stopped three drinks ago.

Description: Adventure, one eye roll at a time.

Description: Because freedom always has a price.

Description: Warning: may spontaneously buy another succulent.

Description: Patriotism that never fades, even off duty.

Description: Because calling them weekdays felt too polite.

Description: For the one who respawns more than they sleep.

Description: Forecast: drunk with a drizzle of regrets.