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Description: Infantry: where the real ones march.

Description: Latin makes everything sound more important.

Description: I sweat more tying my shoes.

Description: Eat like a legend, dress like a cult favorite.

Description: Channeling Odin one rune at a time.

Description: Woke up salty, stayed that way.

Description: Because "goodbye" was just too polite.

Description: I specialize in full-body checkups.

Description: You can take me out of Mexico, but you can't take Mexico out of me.

Description: Puerto Rican made, mainland raised, heart divided.

Description: Correcting my grammar? Not when I'm holding a nail gun.

Description: Night shift: where sleep goes to die.

Description: Censored? Not in this country.

Description: Call it what you want - I call it chingon.

Description: Waving two flags, living one story.

Description: Power tools and power moves, baby.

Description: Mexicana. Chingona. Enough said.

Description: Valentine's Day? Hard pass.

Description: Nacho average fiesta.

Description: Relationship advice: swift and direct

Description: No girlfriend, no emotional rollercoaster.

Description: My heart beats in reps.

Description: Mentally unplugged for maintenance.

Description: Zero urgency. Maximum irony.

Description: Stay wild - it confuses the normal.

Description: Focus like you're trying to save the galaxy.

Description: Tech support, not your emotional support.

Description: Wore this to avoid matching PJs.

Description: Because chaos is less cute unmedicated.

Description: Deep thoughts are overrated - shake it.

Description: Not a regular mom - just trying to keep the next generation tolerable.

Description: Too tired to care, too sore to move.

Description: At least the speeches would be purr-suasive.

Description: Woke up and chose chaos.

Description: I season with spite and garlic.

Description: Tequila brings the spice, vodka brings the bad decisions, rum’s just here for the chaos, whiskey thinks it’s in charge.