Shop Official Merch

Description: Latin never sounded this cheeky.

Description: Because sarcasm is our love language.

Description: Fighting the system, one leaf at a time.

Description: Santa went full polygon and never looked sharper.

Description: No filters, no apologies.

Description: For those who second-guess their second-guessing.

Description: Because sleep won't fix this level of life fatigue.

Description: Grandma's done pretending to like fruitcake.

Description: When the list is long and you're still on the wrong one.

Description: You were warned. Santa doesn't play.

Description: Because even Santa needs to unwind.

Description: Because Santa's packing more than just gifts.

Description: Crying, slaying, and sleighing all season long.

Description: This Valentine's, I'm going neat, not sweet.

Description: For the couple that's dead serious.

Description: Since 496 AD, reminding you you're alone - historically.

Description: Who needs Cupid when you've got cannabis?

Description: Family disappointment? More like legacy.

Description: For the emotionally unavailable and sexually unstoppable.

Description: Bleeding green with zero sleep.

Description: It's not an attitude, it's a lifestyle.

Description: For those born allergic to blending in.

Description: Real hustlers don't brag - they bank.

Description: Live fast, rot deliciously.

Description: For those days when 'customer is always right' makes you want to scream.

Description: Not mad, just dangerously hungry.

Description: Cocktail first, conversation later.

Description: My face has no filter and zero regrets.

Description: That's not roadkill, it's a lifestyle choice.

Description: Your social life in three easy steps.

Description: When you're the GOAT and you "know" it.

Description: Officially too old to care and too awesome to quit.

Description: For those who answer dumb with dumber.

Description: Sip your heartbreak like it's just another drink.

Description: Safety third, attitude first.

Description: Pitch a tent, question your life choices.